Cheese and Biscuits

If someone in Australia offered you a "natural slice of tasty Coon", what would you expect to be eating? In the spirit of adventure (and because I'm a big foodie) I decided to find out.

Strength - The ratings go something like this

• Mild - fair enough
• Tasty - shouldn't all cheeses have a taste of some sort? Who would buy a tasteless cheese (some would argue that Edam falls in to that category)
• Bitey - answers on a postcard?

Format - Cheese slices come in three distinct formats: block, slices and "natural" slices. The block is self-explanatory. "Natural" slices are in fact slices from a block of cheese (for lazy or astigmatic people who either can't be bothered to cut slices or are unable to cut them in regular straight lines). It must be deduced that "slices" are an unnatural creation … as anyone who has read the side of a packet can testify!

I decided to try some tasty natural cheese slices and was looking for a brand I recognise. Apart from the supermarket own brand, the shelves are dominated by two competitors:- Bega and Coon!

I nearly fell out of my trolley when I saw that one … how do they manage to sell anything under that brand name? Does the word "coon" mean the same in Australia as it does elsewhere in the English-speaking world? Well apparently it does, but no-one seems very bothered about it, because the inventor was named Edward William Coon.

Ok, so that's one mystery solved, but it didn't explain anything about the actual "flavour" of the said cheeses. As it happens they were akin to most mild supermarket "cheddar" clones, thoroughly underwhelming. For a truly tasty cheese, we ventured to Queen Victoria Markets to buy some truly tasty cheeses. I can personally recommend Watsonia - a semi-soft cheddar with a mature flavour which rivals anything I've bought at Neal's Yard in years gone by. It only comes in rounds, not natural slices, so I also bought a cheese knife for some extra DIY. Also, the King Island Triple Cream Blue Brie is amazing, very similar to gorgonzola. Not good for the diet, but fantastic food for the soul.